Let’s establish 3 things:
- Change is hard
- Closure is hard
- Both are incredibly important
Most people don’t voice the fact they don’t like change and I can see why. Change brings uncertainty/anxiety. Change is a form of closure and whether that is forced (graduating from school) or chosen (breaking up with a BF/GF) it is a grieving process. Even if it is viewed as a joyous event, there will always be an element of grieving.
Most people fear big change (ie: moving out of your parents house) and again though it’s a joyous event, there are some parts that scare the living shit out of you. The comfort of living with your family and the safety it brings is null and void when you start packing up your childhood bedroom. Your safety is now you and that’s scary because you haven’t yet gained the wisdom from your parents. From now on, you will grow and hold yourself accountable and if you fail, that’s on you too. Disappointing your parents sucks, but not as much as disappointing yourself (and you will do so, it’s the human experience).
You now have all these responsibilities/bills and if you forgot them, the bill collectors will be calling you and only you. But the closure part of that adventure is that you’ve been blessed with all the growth and lessons that your parents passed on you. They figured it out and so will you (albeit in a different economy and political atmosphere).
Let’s talk small scale change, let’s say you and your BFFs all work for the same place, but suddenly you hear of an opening across town. It has different hours, more responsibilities and is for a rival company. Now I’m not going all Mean Girls on you, stay focused. The point is you’re leaving your BFF’s, the people who keep you from acting uncivil towards your incredibly witch boss. You’re going to a new company and the office is nicer, has snacks and just seems to be a full scale upgrade… but it’s still nothing like having the folks who make you feel safe. Plus now you’re afraid those relationships might go to shit! The closure here is working your way up the ladder and thinking how far you’ve come. Though it may take a little more work to keep in touch with your homegirls, it will allow you grow.
They say life begins at end of your comfort zone, not just before the end, but THE END. That requires inevitable growth and change. Sometimes that can feel like a lot, but do it the same way you change your clothes. Think about how you’ll feel when you are finally comfortable, how great you’ll look in that new space, and most importantly remember to take it one thing at a time.